Abuse Victim


Abuse victim. Just seeing these words can be enough to make just about anyone freeze, flee or prepare to fight. However we hear the facts as a fellow victim, a friend, a teacher, an attorney or as the therapist, all witnesses struggle with the same questions. Does anyone ever “get over” the violation of abuse, especially when the ones who do the hurting are the same people who were supposed to be protecting us? Can anyone really have a good adulthood when childhood included early experiences too horrible to put into words? Dolores M. Miller offers us the unequivocal answer that “Yes,” it surely is possible to enjoy the Good that Life offers, no matter what has gone before.

With writings created during her personal journey from victimized child to someone surviving and on to thriving adult, Dolores gives us direct evidence of a true life “happy ending.” In letters to dear friends and family, poetic musings on nature, and loving prayers to the powers of the Universe, she illustrates many of the steps she took to reclaim the shining path of light and love that is her true birthright.

And how does someone get from the victim experience onward to thriving adulthood? By crying, sobbing, and screaming out loud, by raging and by writing, by expressing the horror, the sadness, the longing and the anger until all the parts are heard, loud and clear and usually then to repeat these very same steps, often more than once, because some things still have not been heard enough. Eventually, it becomes possible to “smell the roses” once again.  

It was my privilege to support Dolores through some of these difficult avenues on her recovery journey. I thereby have the honor to bear witness to the strong and secure place she inhabits now, a psychological and spiritual space where she savors all the joys - great and small - that life offers, where she encourages herself and others when the journey of life includes bumps and bruises as are inevitable to the human condition, and where she generously shares Lessons she has gleaned along the way.  

And so, just as Dee oftentimes would get a morning coffee to warm her as she worked towards her truest and best Life, I invite you to get yourself a cup of something warming to sip as you reach into the lovely treasure before you. As surely as the day follows night and “…on the shores of darkness there is light” (John Keats, To Homer), this volume offers real life evidence of one childhood victim who has achieved thriving adulthood. And where there is one, there can be many. We all can benefit by carrying within us this encouragement and support from Dolores M. Miller as we move through a Life that may often times require us to bear witness to the strength and possibility of the human spirit.

In peace, and with all that is Good,

Bonnie Frank Carter,
PhD Wayne, PA